Words from Menages Bday hash!! (Run number 982) Bishopsteignton
A grand total of 27 happy hashers assembled in the carpark in Bishopsteignton, with delighted cheers all around as the Rukka family turned up for the first time in a while! Widey welcomed Lilo Lil and the Rukkas back to Isca, and the instructions were given for the trail (Run really quick. There is food). And so On On into Happy Valley, a steep climb through the bluebells and occasional squawks from Captain Peacock… at the front. Shortly after more squawks were emitted from Xbitz as she spotted a strapping young lad resembling a teenager she once knew come bounding down the hill towards her- Xbtiz and Rukka reunited! They spent so much time reminiscing that they ignored the fishhooks on the long short split! Widey and Peacock were spotted practising their leapfrogging in the lanes, and many a hardy hasher went Long, including Whoopsie Teararse and Mateus Rosie, who managed to confuse a dot for a check and were feared to be lost to the woods forever.
It was at the sweetie stop that we noticed, but seeing as we were at the end of a long section of hills nobody seemed keen to go back and look for them wink emoticon In the end Spocky volunteered and set off over the hills one side of the hedge, only for the girls to come trotting merrily along on the other a few minutes later! Having asked if theyd seen him, Whoopsie said “Who? Oh, sweets!”
Xbitx’s enthusiasm to find her errant husband lasted all of 2 seconds (“On On Spo-ah never mind”) and the shorts headed off on their trail, with the guilty girls and the hares lingering on. Menage laid his ear to the road and declared “1500 yards!”, looking up to find Spocky running haphazardly down the hill 🙂
The longs bounced off across the fields and the shorts walked rather more sedately down through the village back to the carpark and Chez Menage, where it was noticed another hasher was missing! Larks vomit had Slipperys kit in his car, and volunteered to go look for him. Spocky and Titbitz were adamant they’d seen him over their shoulders until the last 500m home, so where had he gone?
Turns out he had seen some white road markings (the ‘dig here’ kind) and followed those instead.
A glorious bbq and spread was laid on by Tully (Mrs Menage) with RedRock beer being the drink of choice, and TWO fabulous cakes being brought out and sung to. Down Downs went to: Hare Menage, Widey for not remembering where Menage lives and trying to take a big van down a narrow lane. Melon Picker for missing a part of the trail and bullshitting (!), slippery for following road markings and Quick Rukka for his attempt at a beard!!
On On!! Lilo xx
15/04/2015 Pynes Hill, Exeter OD The Blue Ball, Sandygate Hares: Imelda and Wide Reciever
… In the beginning was the Word and the Word was On-On!
We gathered at the dimming of the day in the midst of Pynes Hill business park. The weather was sublime. Barely a cloud in sight. The sun slowly sinking towards the horizon in a glorious sunset as we ran, walked and stumbled into the wide open skies of Ludwell Valley park.
Plenty of long short splits and fishooks kept us on our toes as we circumnavigated the valley and it’s many hills. The FRB’s often having to run the same hill two or three time due to the cunning use of fishhooks. Screech was spotted checking out the trail on a distant hilltop after we rejoined the shorts from the first long/short split.
On one of the Long splits we had to leap down into a stream. Shortly afterward I noticed Whoopsie’s backside was coverd in mud. Vehemently denying that she had fallen over, Whoopsie claimed that she “just slid down in the stream on her bottom so that she wouldn’t fall over” stinging her hands in the process.
The sweetie stop was at the bottom of the biggest, steepest incline of Mount Ludwell. Fuelled with Jelly Bunnies and choclate, Minx and Paddy legged it halfay up the hill and then rolly-polyed down, much to the delight of Herbie the dog who intercepted them like a missile, pouncing on their heads!
Spocky challenged me to a race up the hill which I gladly accepted, almost busting a gut to get to the top ahead of him, only to find a nice fishhook for 10 at the top, so back down we went.
This was the first Isca trail of the year for me without a torch, and we finshed in 59 minutes with plenty of natural light to see by.
Down downs went to: The Hares: Imelda and Wide Reciever, for an excellent, very sweaty hash Minx: Almost falling over when running funny and fish hook avoidance TitBitz: fish hook avoidance and no knickers Big Issue: Bringing out her supply of polos just before the sweetie stop Boots in puss: Allowing Herbie to molest Minx and Paddy.
The Blue Ball Inn took our custom for the evening. Purveyors of some mightily fine cheesy chips and also one of the longest waits I’ve ever had to get served a beer on a hash. I almost finished writing these Words while I was waiting. Buzby’s rack of ribs were bigger than his head but far from putting him off he bravely finished the lot. Man Vs Food. Man won. Screech asked Buzby: “Can I have one of your ribs Buz?”. Isn’t that what God supposedly said to Adam in the Garden of Eden? Slippery appeared in the pub having not been on trail. I heard him shouting out at one point “Who’s sniffing at my crotch”.
Having changed out of my sweaty running gear into nice clean clothes I then left the pub, cycled home and was drenched in sweat again by the time I got there. They don’t call me Damp Patch for nothing.
8th April 2015: the Nobody Inn, Doddiscombsleigh.
Far over the Hills of Haldon cold… To valleys deep and taverns old We must away ere end of day, To hash the long-untrodden wold.
Wednesday 8th April; a day of glorious sunshine and azure blue skies, Spring was well and truly in the air (or for Daily Express readers “Easter Heatwave Hell sweeps Britain!”).
Thirty three gathered at the Nobody Inn as the sun was sinking in the sky for ‘don’t call me Crazy’ Minx and Paddy Pants Down’s Virgin Isca trail. Minx is about to start a job at the Met Office so we were encouraged to dress in suitable weather/Met Office themed attire. There were many fine attempts. To name a few: Wide Receiver and Tight Lips as a double rainbow, Coatcheck with Michael Fish on her back, the Bitz’s in weather themed headgear, Woodpecker came half dressed for a rainstorm and half for a heatwave and Soapy looked very warm in her Olaf (from Frozen) outfit. In the circle we were introduced to the Virgins (Ben and Sian) and some visitors (‘This Big’ and ‘Kilinchi’).
Minx, dressed as Storm from X-men, with a very convincing blond wig, and Paddy, dressed up ready for a BBQ Summer, sent us on our way. This was a new hashing area for me and it was a proper Devon rural idyll. Meadows full of lush, green grass and wildflowers, babbling brooks, light and airy woodland full of primroses, spring lambs in the fields. If it hadn’t been for the many, many, energy sapping hills and numerous fishhooks I could have died and gone to heaven. As it happened, because of the hills and fishhooks I felt like I was going to die on several occasions! Imelda attempted to break his neck by tumbling head first off a stile and Monty the dog attempted to snap my knee by wiping me out completely in the woods (who would have thought a dog Monty’s size could be so solid!).
At the sweetie stop we had some lovely Minx-made cakes bedecked with the Met Office logo. By this point it was getting quite dark and very cold. Cloudless skies were leading to rapid radiative cooling of the Teign valley and me.
Back at the pub, down downs were awarded to: ●the hares for an excellent trail, ●the Virgins, ●Bareback for saying “I gave birth to a lamb once”. ●Boots for stealing and carrying Spockys windmill hat around the trail ●Me for carrying a pineapple around the trail and getting very cold wearing Hawaiian shirt and shorts(I was dressed as the pineapple express).
The Nobody Inn were excellent hosts. Very good food and beer and a very good time was had by all, especially Bigfoot who was couldn’t have been more delighted by all the kisses he was getting from the harriets as they were leaving!